I got an e-mail from a friend. He got some stuff that I sent him. He basically wrote that he got the stuff and ended by saying 'Have a good Thanksgiving. We have a lot to be thankful for'
I think he had it right. Stress or not in life, it's been good. Every year, you at least be thankful for the new additions - the kids - Carmel, Lucas, Blaise, Nathan. The kids that are to come for friends. The growth of kids that you've known for awhile. The beauty of being an uncle to family and Family.
The weather is nice and cool outside - 45 right now, but there is definitely a warmth that comes to mind with you are minded of the babies that just fall asleep on your shoulder or the little kids that run around and then glue themselves to your leg - and the occasional wrestling.
I have not eaten so well in years. New York was phenomenal - it has a special place in my stomach - and extra compartment that just opens up. I have enjoyed many wonderful meals with friends and family. They have always been gracious to share their new discoveries with me. An extra mmm mmm to Snow's, the chicken and rice cart and Korean Fried Chicken.
Work in this economy truly is a blessing - to be able to interact with others and be given wages to live on. If I had not changed jobs, I would have had a lot more stress in life for a 1% raise at best. Instead I am at a new job with less stress and a more than 10% raise. With that I have been thankful and able to think more generously about giving to others - taking care of the bill or contributing more. I am thankful to be able to give more.
I am thankful for the openness of my friends. I went through a pretty rough patch with the passing of my uncle Pat. I was surrounded with friends that knew how to listen well more than anything else. They were good at giving me my space and being around when I needed someone. I have engaged in some pretty tough conversations of what happens when faith intersects life, and I am honored to be around people that will listen and wrestle with the issues - not give answers, but giving their hearts to the issue . . . not even the issue - the people that it affects.
Aside from the traffic on the roads, I really like Thanksgiving. Before the craziness of what people think is a cultural entitlement to gifts, there is this time of coming together for a meal - a true communion.
The other day I was watching Zachy and Gabby. I love those kids.
Zachy has grown up so much - very responsible. He's a great helper. He got all excited about finding ways to get Gabby to come to the dinner table and eat. Gabby knows my name well now. When I arrived and came in, she was all excited to run to her parents and tell them that Uncle Bri was there. Gabby was all animated - sometimes being a puppy. And boy can she turn on those puppy dog eyes. I loved that the kids were excited to show me their new beds. Zachy got out an extra wii controller so the both of us could play Star Wars together.
I am reminded that Zachy is about the age I also saw Joshua taking the steps of being big brother to Noah. You can see Zachy trying to do good things to help Gabby. Even if he is frustrated at her lack of sharing, his principles are usually right. Gabby in her girliness adores this pink purse that says "Princess" on it. Rachel told me that Zachy was at this party one time and he cashed in a lot of his tickets to get that pink purse for Gabby. What a guy! I still remember when we went to Chuck E Cheese, he made sure to get a prize for Gabby (as well as himself).
I don't think I've ever heard Rach or Wey tell Zachy what it means to be a big brother. I'm sure early on they told him that he had to be gentle with her when she was just an infant, but nothing about the day to day. I don't know if you can really teach the kind of generosity that Zachy has early on. Sharing is one thing, but buying something solely for someone else - that's another. And let's be honest, it wasn't one of those - let me get it for you, but I'll use it later for myself. I don't see Zachy want to flaunt that purse around his friends.
At the end of the night, Rachel told the kids to race to give me a hug. Zachy won, but it was even cute to see Gabby frustrated that she thought there wasn't room to hug me. She's one goofy little girl with a great big brother. I am really thankful to be able to peek into their lives and see them grow.
*Zachy asked to pray at dinner. He thanked God that his mom and dad could go to a wedding. He prayed that they would have a good time. He thanked God for me being there to hang out with them too. Zachy really didn't ask for anything for himself. He was just thankful and prayed for others to have a good time. Maybe I need to take a page out of his book . . .
I usually re-process days during the evening or the next morning. It's usually what keeps me up at night or is the 1st thing that I think of in the morning. After going to church so many years, usually I've heard a lot of the same viewpoints - just different kind of contexts. Don't get me wrong I still have my struggles figuring out my stance on various positions - you kind of change as you are exposed to more in life.
Experience in any situation is key, but it's not like I want to experience everything. I respect the people in the military that understand the value of a human life because they have taken it or seen it taken in front of them, but I never want that. I will never experience stuff like birthing a child or being born with autism, but I have respect for those people.
The other day my friend was talking about hearing a speaker talk about suffering and creation. There was a piece about suffering that I found really interesting, but it takes more time to process. Most people know that piece about "Consider it pure joy . . ." and how it is a good thing that grows you, etc. But it has always seemed like an individualized thing. That's what I go through. People will try to be your friend - sympathy, empathy. I never felt like that verse in James helped much. It was more of a "This is supposed to comfort me, but this doesn't take any of the pain away."
But my friend told me the speaker asked people to stand up that have dealt with cancer - had it, had a family member with it, etc. He talked about how in life, suffering brings people together. Regardless of their differences, it brings people together - some walls (income, social class, race, nationality) break down and people connect with others. And instead of in a post-suffering experience, you get a glimpse of something beautiful in the moment.
I think one piece is obvious - duh - when someone has a major illness, family comes together - pay their respects. Some family reunions are messier as blame can be shoved around. Other times people put aside their old arguments or even realize that life is too short to live holding a grudge. That's one side.
On the other side, there's this thing that society has started - support groups. A friend was talking to me that there is a support group for mom's that are stepmoms. I thought it was beautiful. Moms that came into a family where there was already a kid or more, and these moms are together to try to talk about and give more love to the family instead of just being some additional person that is there in the house. There are lots of cancer groups out there. Groups whose existence of some issues that are too taboo for mention in the workplace - even church at some places.
I really like the idea of how suffering can bring unity to humanity - allowing people to cross borders. It doesn't happen all the time though. Sometimes you gotta ask for help. Sometimes you gotta wait for others to show up.
In sports, it's one thing to practice by yourself. Another to have someone along pushing you. Even if it's someone feeding tennis balls, keeping count of laps/suicides, etc. I think about the people cheering on the sidelines of races. I think of coaches that tell have told me - one more. Only to find that after you finish that lap, sprint, rep or whatever to find them say "one more!' - and you keep doing it. I realize that suffering breeds a dependency of unity, and I can live with that.
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The year is not over yet, but I have to say that this year has been filled with moments of things just being "right."
Sometimes I think we wander around - trying to figure out what we're supposed to be doing, where are we supposed to be. Where should I live? Who should I be hanging around? etc. Honestly you never know until you look back.
So far this year:
I left Starbucks for Jamba Juice
I left about 3 weeks of vacation that I never got to take or receive pay for.
But I also left a lot of stress. I actually got to take unpaid time off to visit my beautiful niece and nephew (brother and sister and law too but let's be honest on why I really went)
I got to take a 2 week trip with my parents and go on a good hike up a mountain - seeing my parents' perseverance and commitment to "togetherness"
I got to take a week vacation in NY with Alex (but to be honest, it was about the food - j/k)
I've moved to East Austin - a little less cushy, but it has made me a better person
I'm biking around. I'm starting to run again - I actually feel like I'm running better than when I was training for my marathon.
I took the step to commit to tutoring at a local middle school - and I think about my kids and their progress
I've gotten to babysit (aka play) with my friends' kids again - used to just be little Tsangs and Lees, but we've added Peters and another Lee.
I'm not working insane hours with fast food as my only option late at night.
I'm cooking a little more and enjoying a meal with Kev as we watch TV
*Kev and I first really bonded eating these awesome sub sandwiches in Albany, NY watching playoff basketball.
My Uncle Pat passed away after a long battle with cancer this year, but things felt right when I went back to see him for the last time. You really don't know how to say bye to someone when you know that it's probably the last time you'll see him breathing, sitting next to you. That trip was definitely one where in the moment, it felt like I should have been there. A week or two later after he passed away and all the family was there - it just felt right. Chris' flight got delayed in Dallas - which allowed him and his family to be around.
I wouldn't say that God came down and threw this vision of what I should be doing. There were some risks here and there, but nothing too horrible. I just feel very blessed. I feel like I'm learning again - in a new way. I cried the most I have in years when my uncle passed away. I felt fortunate to have peers honestly ask how I was doing. I could handle things in my head alright, but it was healthy to talk about things and let it out.
There are new challenging situations at Vox - the issues have always existed in life, but it's a different thing when they intersect your community. I'm thankful for the leadership and the honesty in our circle of friends. The insight and the laughter are all part of the feeling of things just being "right."
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I used to say that I love it when it's cold outside and you just breathe the cool crisp air, but something changed. Hannah and I ran a small loop around Town Lake (a part that I never ran before but is awesome). A week before, she kicked my butt burning me at the end. That day sucked - not cuz she beat me, but because we made a few stops here and there where water fountains didn't work. It was a shorter run, but the humidity made it feel like 90 and you could feel the sweat on your shirt weigh you down. This day was different. We went longer. We never stopped. We weren't tired. We felt good because it was just right - you could breathe in the air, but you didn't have to process cold to warm. You sweat and it just naturally dried. The air was crisp and clean, but you didn't even notice it.
It was like the Sunday ride the week before. It wasn't about skill or anything. Just riding and being with people - everyone from the high mileage bikers (Harm, Enoch, Gid) to the casual (Jen, Tandra, Joshua). I didn't feel like I was doing much the entire time other than chatting with people. I love our community. Those are truly the moments of just being. Those moments of just doing life together.
The other morning I made this awesome breakfast hash that Kev and I shared. That evening Kev cooked up the steaks. A day of good eating and just resting. Oh yeah, and I did have work in between that, but work is no longer one of the major things going on in my life.
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There's this feeling after a good shower where you feel like your skin is breathing. But then there's this feeling after you use one of those face wash soaps - then after that you REALLY feel like your pores have all opened and you're breathing in life. That's when I'm truly refreshed and ready to go.
I am usually a restless person, but there's this image/theory I have. When I take a good shower and then go to bed, it's like my body is breathing in rest - the pores are taking in the softness of the little cotton fibers in my blanket. It's like I'm absorbing the physical nature of rest. Add some cold weather and you gotta love staying in bed. It just feels right.
I am in New York as I write/type. I'm taking a break. It's been great checking things out. One of my favorite themes of writing about usually has to do with community - whether it be the kids, families, various affinity groups, etc.
Last week, I was eating out with two friends - single guys. Out of the blue, one says 'marriage - that is so stupid. Why do people think of that stuff?'
Well, I have found something deep and profound . . . ok maybe neither.
So I had one mission for my trip - to eat - to eat a lot and to eat well.
Day 1 - mainly traveling - so let's avoid that
Day 2 - hung out with my brother, Scott, Marian, Wei, and Sandy
We had a long list ahead of us and we figured we had to have a strategy. We would share plates.
So for starters;
1. Clinton Street Bakery - split the blueberry pancakes and brioche French toast
2. Doughnut plant - halved some donuts - tres leches, PB & J, creme brulee
Boring part - shopping - H&M, Uniqlo - mainly was the guys waiting for the girls - the price you gotta pay
3. Joe Shanghai - 5 orders of XLB, veggies, rice, and tea
Hanging out rushing for tickets
4. Ippudo - Shoyu ramen with braised pork belly and an extra serving of noodles (could have done another but I had to make room) - this was the only thing I didn't share
5. Bon Chon - Mad for Chicken - split spicy and salty wings added some soju as wel.
6. Halal Cart - Chicken and Rice Split 6 ways
This was a wonderful day. We never could have hit all the places and eaten all that food without the help of 6 people eating - everything was like a small appetizer for the next meal. They say that it's best to eat several small meals rather than a large meal or two a day. Add walking all day and I would say we were really healthy as well.
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Scott pointed out to me that the effect of eating several meals is a definite pro of being married - especially if your spouse to a light weight. The only con he pointed out was waiting during shopping, but he actually called it a push since he said Marian shops for him too so that cuts down time.
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The next day was harder - not because we ate so much the day before. It was harder because Al went off to Jersey and Wei and Sandy left back for Austin. 3 is a tough number. If it wasn't for Sandy joining us for dinner - and picking out good Thai food, we would not have been able to gloriously have a 2nd dinner of UF Chicken - unidentified flying chickens. We got to taste all the flavors as well.
Eatting at so many places would be a very difficult task to complete if I was alone, but it was definitely a team effort that made it possible to hit so many places so quickly - probably helped shave off a day or so.
This post is all about the benefits of community. Let's be honest - one person can't eat that many places. Even a married couple is limited. 3 was difficult. The 'economies of scale' start around 4 - maximized around 6. 8 becomes a little hard to get into a place all together.
Glorious . . . food. More to come and go down my belly.
I really respect those around me that continue to learn or strive to learn. I was a "good student," but it took me awhile to find things that I love or am interested in learning about or interested in doing.
Luckily these last few evenings have been cooling down around 6ish. So I think I'm going to learn to run again. I want to learn how to bike again. And hopefully, I'll be ready for a sprint tri come April.
I want to "learn to pray" again. Growing up, people tell you that "it's a conversation with God." And I think that's true to a point, but there is something about the prayers that are read at Vox - a collective group prayer that has thought. Harmon gave me a title of a book awhile back. I think what's interesting about some of the selections is that they show a soul - I guess it's like reading a book, studying a culture, hearing a friend's heart.
Over a year ago, a bunch of friends and I did the Human Race training. Sure there was a big promo push and I was in it a lot for the swag. The Human Race is coming around again - not in Austin though. The other day I was dead tired from a 12+ hour day, but I knew that I needed to get some exercise. There's something refreshing about "not thinking" while you exercise.
I feel very grateful to be in a place of rest and great perspective. Many times it is hard to see "the hand of God" or "God" for that matter in the day to day or even month to month. Sometimes you think if you stare/squint hard enough at life that it'll just come to you. Not so much. God has usually shown up best in the conversations I have with friends. The reflections of what has happened in the last few months/weeks or the last time we crossed paths.
So things I am thankful for in no particular order:
1. Work
I'm not just any workaholic. I love what I do. I'm thankful that the right doors opened for me to work at Jamba Juice - getting paid more, less stressed, and generally happier. I lost a few employees but for good reasons - i.e. them finding a job in this economy to do what they want - i.e. one guy that wants to be a personal trainer got a job at Pure Austin. This economy is tough enough to get a job, but I'm thankful for the understanding side of my boss - we can talk through pretty much anything. A few insights here and there, but still letting me grow and have ownership of my decisions. There's freedom in my schedule as well. I've been able to take time off to see family, friends, and even help out a friend that just needed a babysitter for a few hours. God has been good in helping me in my journey of "recovering from being a workaholic"
2. Vox Community
Years ago, I felt like it might have been my time to leave Austin. The kids were growing up. I wasn't asked to watch them as much. I had stepped away from responsibilities to the point that most people don't know that I helped a lot in the past. Things seemed like it would be time for me to find a new place. This past year I even debated Peace Corp. But this year's move to East Austin has been really good. I've been able to ease into conversations about how to live my life purposely. I haven't been forced into anything, but I have a deep sense of responsibility - where am I going to contribute in a positive way. I live close to the high school that was deemed academically unacceptable last yr and close to the middle school that was to close as well. I'm challenged by the fact that most people are working their butts off or finding channels to help - so I'm figuring out which channel to aid.
I've enjoyed the kids and community of Vox even more lately. You gotta love the Seefeldts. What other family has instilled friendship and education so well in their kid that disciplining their kid is telling him that they'll pull him out of school if he doesn't behave. Abner just loves people and loves to share his knowledge. The parents of Vox have really shown great generosity to each other and it shows in their kids - very willing to share.
3. Parents
I've spent some time with my friends lately. Some with new ventures in their lives - moving, children,etc. I have helped watch my friends' kids at times, but I don't think I've been so exposed to the 1st few weeks/months before. And it is tremendously difficult to support - physically/emotionally. I consider myself a robot when it comes to work/rest, but parents with newborns trump my discipline and perseverance. It's so hard. When friends tell you they've given their all, but feel defeated in their ability to provide. Parenthood is extraordinarily difficult. I'm reminded of the times I've seen my friends' kids throw fits, and the parent has tried everything in their being - energy, emotion, etc but is unable to appease the kid - (not just eat/sleep/clean, but friendships/toys, feelings). It's one of the worst feelings in the world as a friend that I can't help. Yet within that is this new blossoming beauty. I feel like I've gotten to see the extent of what man can do, and I can see the beauty of what happens when God shows up.
I love my parents. They went to church until they couldn't contain my oldest brother's cries. At times, my dad traveled a lot. I'm sure there was strain on my mom while he was gone - even with my grandparents around. Yet, I feel like my brothers and I always felt loved and provided for - even to this day. I think kids don't get to see how much their parents loved them until they see their parents act as grandparents. My dad is a crazy man when he sees my niece (his granddaughter). He'd give her anything she shows even semi interest in. He'll start making funny faces and sounds. My mom's gift is the conversation and the freedom. I think she's neither conservative nor liberal -she's understanding. I think I get that piece from her about trying to understand values and other people's expressions of those values. My mom shows good restraint from giving recommendations unless being asked.
I obviously don't have a kid yet. Not even close. A few BIG steps have to happen before I even get close to that. But I feel like these past few days, I've been able to understand that "God the Father" piece a lot more. It's always easier for me to get the Jesus piece earlier - human piece - friend piece. A lot more casual. I think I've always heard a lot of the God as Jesus sacrifice piece, but I feel like I've been more exposed to God as the Father sacrificing piece more lately.
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It has been a beautiful journey. The latest thing that has been on my mind has a little to do with what's in the news - health care reform, economy, etc. There are single moms living on min wage raising several kids. I've had this crazy idea. What if I lived off less and tried to know what it was like to live like a single mom? What if I lived off less and gave the extra $ to someone else to make things more "equal." I would also be learning what my financial situation would look like if I was either a) dating or b) married as a sole income with kids. I'm not sure what's stopping me right now. I'm trying to figure out what the median income is nationally, statewide, locally, or even within my zipcode. I don't know where to start but that is part of my next step in this exploration of living deep lives of understanding and "connectivity" to community.
I grabbed lunch with Abel today. Another cool guy who I don't know how we started talking, but I enjoy good conversation with him. Abel is living the life. I've been told before that I'm mature for my age, but Abel who is 5 yrs younger than me is living the life I wish I had the guts to do earlier. He's off to Guyana - World Teach. Not exactly sure what he's doing aside from immersing himself in another culture and trying to help them.
We talked about life. The east side. Refugees. We didn't necessarily look at Scripture or anything but we talked about how we perceive things. Abel is about to leave, but lately he has been working with refugees. It's interesting how the Israelites were refugees all the time. I'm reminded of the story of Ruth and how the kindness of Boaz was redemption for the refugee.
Abel and I talked about how our parents all came to America for a better life. We recognize that maybe we're not living that "better life," but in one generation, we get to try to help others in the world that aren't able to make the trip to America for a better life. That to a certain extent instead of frustration from our parents, a different perspective could be this amazing awe for how fast that help can extend to beyond a nuclear family. I know that my dad was able to help his brothers and sisters come to America. But how awesome it is to see a bigger world picture - a picture that isn't just asian/indian/american, but a picture that includes S. America, Europe, and Africa.
I've lived on the East side for about 2 months now. A lot of observing. The last few talks from Vox, I've been captured by passages talking about generosity - giving so that others are not in need. I'm reminded of talks and passages - help the sick, those that are craving.
I've always lived a pretty simple life. Not much flare to me. Yet, it's not about living simply. It's not just necessarily equilibrium. I've had more time to think since I've moved and done the job change. A lot of my personal volatility of life has calmed down. I realize that there are those that are seeking help and those that we perceive need help. i.e. thinking because certain people live in certain situations, they need those conditions to be "upgraded" - whether it be living situation, education, etc. Ignorance of a better life aside and all - Abel reminded me that there are people out there that are asking - hungry for knowledge, development, etc.
I hear about people struggling to teach kids at school because the kids don't care. The kids are there because it's the law or that it's a convenient tax paid babysitting for them. Yet on another hand, you have refugee kids that are hungry for knowledge, a job, etc. They've been through hell and they understand that they've been given an opportunity to be given resources to be in a better situation.
Sure it's tough to figure out those deep issues with your literal neighbors, but maybe they're not in need. (And we've got to toss that old version of evangelism of everyone is a hungry lonely person with a hole that only God can fill judgement). Maybe God wants us to find those that are expressing/asking for help 1st before we decide that our niche is those that are similar and just waiting for them to express their deep personal needs - and assuming that we some how have it better because "God is on our side." I'm reminded of a conversation with Sam about finding God in other people. Sometimes finding/experiencing and knowing more of God is in the journey of finding him the face, culture, and lifestyle of people different than your self.
This was definitely a bunch of ramblings, but I have to say that my conversation with Abel was just full of that awesome energy/excitement of living. I asked Abel about when the switch was really flipped and he talked about having the offer letter from another company and the peace corp one in front of him. He talked about how dead the "satisfaction" of having a check was. It was going back to that model or trying something else. Abel talked about how his dad asked if this was going to further his career, and there was something more of the value of something else - not necessarily saving the world but doing something that impacts others. It's beautiful. I'm jealous. A story to tell others. Abel will be a legend.
Usually, it's the older person using parentese with kids - encouraging them for little things. Good job! Whether it be my niece working on being potty trained or just kids doing the right thing by sharing, the one thing you can always give is verbal praise and encouragement.
I haven't hung out with Addison and Justice that much other than Vox gatherings, but you gotta love those guys. Huge smiles and they always share - whether it be food or a little stuffed animal. Once they offer you something, and you try to give it back, they refuse - they just want to give you the toys. I have always loved watching Justice 'run' - more like a fast waddle.
Anyways, so it started off with Addison and me - we worked on his 'house' - he only knew how to write the letter A, but he wanted to make sure we labeled the house with the following names; Addison, Justice, Joshua, Noah, Mom and Dad. We started on that it and it was cool seeing him at his learning stage - numbers and letters. Justice has a really good knowledge of body parts - eyes, ears, nose, tummy (everyone loves tummy).
So I'm really not good at crafts. I suck at art, but as I cut out the letter A for Addison, he would say things like. 'Yeah, that's perfect!' We made several different versions of his Wolverine claws but each time, he would say 'yeah, that's perfect' Sure, he wanted longer claws each time, but what can you say to a kid with those eyes as he tells you that everything you make him is perfect?!?
We played hide and seek, but it was hilarious because Addison wanted you to make a sound after you hid. Then, it was a little wrestling. There's nothing like hanging out and playing with kids after a day of work. You definitely get that 2nd wind. Addison wanted to take a bunch of pictures for his cousins. One time he said, "Take a picture of me. It's for Nana and Riley because they love me." I thought it was cool when he asked if I was going with them the next time they're going to Amarillo.
It's one thing to get encouragement from work - cuz you're just doing your job and trying to do better. It's another thing to get encouragement from a 4 yr old that energizes you to make more cool toys. It's been awhile since I've "created" anything. What amazed me more was how much Addison cares about others. I suggested that I leave my Wolverine claws so his dad could play with him. Addison insisted that I take my claws home so I could play with them at home too. Still sharing, still caring that other people have fun too. Props to Dallas and Tandra for not only creating mega cute kids but teaching them to care about others at such an early age.
I've always enjoyed watching other people's kids. From the kids, I learn perspective. From the parents, I learn how much you can teach a kid. We got a lot of amazing parents at Vox, and I'm honored to get to learn from their entire families. Usually I enjoy learning from people that are more seasoned/experienced in life than me, but I also enjoy the surprises I learn from the children. Uncle Brian loves this community.
This past weekend, I got to reconnect with two friends in Houston. We've been friends for a long time. Some since college. Another person half my life. We talked about a lot of different things - spiritual stuff, family, etc. As we talked about recreating ourselves, one friend mentioned that of all people, I probably recreated myself the most after college. Most people recreate themselves when they transition from high school to college. I took another transition after I graduated as well.
What I really enjoyed about this group of friends is that we can talk with depth to our conversations as well. We talked about Lent and the entire giving up thing - as well as the what are we doing. We can be honest about how hard it is to "prioritize" doing the "spiritual" stuff like praying.
As we chatted over brunch, there was one dialogue that I found really interesting and resounded. One friend talked about how he was talking to a missions admissions person. He and his wife felt like they were called to a people but not necessarily a place. So the missions admin person talked about how sometimes it's not really a place either, btu sometimes people are called more to a "team." There was the idea of how God places you to work with certain people - the team dynamics. Supposedly 50% of attrition from missions comes from people not interacting well with their team.
So admin said that they have a candidacy program, where people interact with various teams - working various places, various strategies, various places, etc - and then some times people just find others intriguing and they invite them to their team or they want to be mentored or learn in one of those environments.
There's this thought that calling was something of a God whispering to you thing. My friends and I have never had a burning bush or God whispering at us in the middle of the night experience. But what I found interesting about this other idea of calling is that sometimes God calls you to a community or a vision. Things are always easier to describe or correlate looking backwards. I think for me - there was this community aspect of Vox. Or maybe pre-Vox. I'm not one of those cool indie music on the cutting edge of culture people, but I knew that I wanted to stay in Austin after I graduated. I can't believe I've been here for 10 yrs now. But I would say that there is calling to be part of my community - the families (esp kids) that I love, the tough decisions we've had to make, the amazing ways we've looked back and seen God provide in the short and long term - pretty much every location we've landed at in these 10 yrs. There's something cool about this concept of a community calling - the affirmation comes with how you connect with you and your personal vision/goal/direction. The affirmation comes from people asking you to partner with them or be their friends. Truly a sense of God using the community around you to speak that purpose.
I know I'm really not communicating this as well as my friend put it, but there were all these ideas flowing through my head - the calling of the people I've gotten to work with at various stages of my working career, etc. It's really beautiful. A true sense of knowing why I am where I am and feeling good about it. In a sense then, there's this connection to calling and your personal community. Like maybe if you're not gelling with a certain group of people, then maybe you shouldn't be there - be it your job, your church, etc. I think about how Peter and Paul went various ways. I think about how Barnabas and Titus were asked to be partners with certain people instead of others - it's not necessarily right/wrong, but more of how we're wired to best help those around us. It's an amazing idea. A community calling.
